Italics are one of the most overused—and misunderstood—tools in fiction writing.
Especially in first person, where the entire narration already lives inside the character’s head, it’s easy to get carried away with formatting. In this post, we’ll break down when italicizing internal thoughts actually helps your story… and when it just gets in the way.
Writing is a craft, not a checklist. This post reflects my perspective as a professional fiction editor who works primarily in romance, thriller, and emotionally intense fiction. While I reference style guides like Chicago Manual of Style and New Hart’s Rules, every writer has their own rhythm—and every story its own demands. There’s no single “right way,” but there are better tools for clarity, pacing, and emotional impact. My job is to help you find yours.
When italicizing internal thoughts adds emotional impact
How first-person vs third-person affects your formatting choices
What Chicago Manual of Style and New Hart’s Rules say
What to do if you hate italics—and how to build tension without them
How to stay consistent across POVs, genres, and meet accessibility needs
Use italics for direct, unfiltered inner dialogue, especially when:
The voice or tense shifts (e.g. Get it together, girl.)
The line interrupts the narrative like a jolt or spike of emotion
You want to show raw urgency, conflict, or panic
Example:
I keep walking. I keep breathing.
Don’t stop. Don’t fall apart.
I can’t let him see me break.
This works because it mimics the character’s mental “shout”—a private thought that cuts through the narration.
If the narration already captures the thought clearly
If you’re using italics as a crutch for weak internal voice
If it becomes distracting, repetitive, or performative
Overkill Example:
I don’t know what to do. I take a step. Should I run? No. Maybe I should just stay still.
Italics aren’t a substitute for tension. They’re a tool—not a crutch!
In third person, italics for internal thoughts are more common—and more useful. That’s because there’s a layer of narrative distance between the narrator and the character’s voice.
🔁 Why It Matters:
In first person, the narration is the character’s thoughts
In third person, the narration is observing the character—so italics help distinguish when we’re slipping deeper into their mind
Example (third person deep POV):
She stared at the closed door. Maybe he’s not coming.
This helps the reader feel the character’s internal voice more vividly—especially when it breaks tense, grammar, or rhythm.
“First-person narration typically doesn’t require typographic distinction for thoughts.”
“Use italics for unspoken thoughts only if they are brief and interrupt the surrounding text. Avoid overuse.”
Both guides say italics are optional—but if you use them, use them sparingly and intentionally.
Good news: you don’t have to use them!!
If you find italics distracting, inaccessible, or just not your style, there are powerful alternatives that keep your prose clean and emotionally rich.
🧠 Try This Instead:
1. Rely on Deep POV
Let your narration blur into the character’s mind—no formatting needed:
She clenched the keys in her fist. He wasn’t going to do this to her again.
2. Use Indirect Thought
Summarize thoughts instead of quoting them:
He didn’t want to admit it, but the truth sat heavy in his chest.
3. Lean on Rhythm
Fragments, punchy clauses, breathless pacing—these all feel like internal voice:
I open the door. Wait. No—don’t. Not yet.
If you go this route, just be consistent. Note it in your style sheet so your editor knows what to expect.
Whether you use italics or not, consistency is everything.
Avoid random formatting switches, especially in dual POV or series fiction. And if you’re submitting to a traditional press or working with an editor, ask if there’s a house style.
➡️ Self-publishing? Build a simple style sheet that outlines:
When/if you use italics
Whether you allow tense shifts in thoughts
How you format indirect vs. direct thoughts
In genres like YA, fantasy, or thrillers, readers expect a bit more typographic flair—especially for fast-paced or emotionally heightened internal monologue. Italics can enhance clarity and tone.
But again: voice should always carry the weight.
Use formatting to support, not substitute.
Excessive italics can be visually tiring for some neurodivergent readers and difficult to process via screen readers. If your audience includes diverse reading needs, consider scaling back and letting rhythm, punctuation, and tone do the work.
Try reading your scene aloud.
If the line sounds like something your character would mutter, scream, or whisper to themselves—italics might work.
If not? Let your narrative voice carry the weight.
It’s not about rules. It’s about clarity, intimacy, and control.
Written by Dr Mekhala Spencer
Senior Editor at All The Proof | Romance & Thriller Fiction Specialist
I help authors refine first- and third-person voice so it reads clean, powerful, and emotionally intense—without over-formatting or second-guessing.
Let’s make your story sharper, tighter, and unforgettable.
👉 Book a sample edit or browse my editing packages.
Dr Mekhala Spencer is a professional line and copy editor with five years of experience helping romance, thriller, and emotionally intense fiction shine without losing its voice.
She’s not here to rewrite your story—she’s here to elevate it.
Mekhala holds credentials from the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CiEP), Louise Harnby’s “Switching to Fiction” course, and multiple accredited proofreading diplomas. She also brings the analytical edge of a PhD in Biochemistry and a BSc (Hons) in Molecular Biology with Genetics—because precision matters.
You might also know her as @alltheproof_mekhala on Instagram, where she shares real talk about editing, voice, and craft.
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